To My Oldest Child

To My Oldest Child

There is so much you have to learn in life.  You have failed to follow my guidance.  I do not know how you have been led astray.  I do not know how you have fallen off of the Tao. 

I told you not to drink, and you drink. 

I told you not to smoke, and you smoke.

I told you not to play games with a woman’s heart, and you are a player of hearts

I told you not to take drugs, and you take drugs.

I told you not to spend unwisely, and you spend unwisely.

I told you not to steal, and you steal.

I told you not to bully, and you bully.

I told you not to spend time with criminals, and you spend time with criminals.

I told you not to do harmful things to your body, and you do harmful things to yourself.

I told you to learn from your mistakes, but you have made the same mistakes over and over.

I told you not to be promiscuous, and you are promiscuous.

I told you to stay near, and you have moved far away.

I told you to be responsible, and you are irresponsible.

Every time I try to teach you, you get angry. 

Every time I try to teach you, you tell me I am giving you a lecture.

Every time I try to teach you, you tell me you don’t want to hear it.

Every time I try to teach you, you close your ears.

Every time I try to teach you, you run away.

As your father, I have given up on trying to teach you through my words.  I can only lead by example.  I can only embody the Tao.  If you cannot learn by seeing and observing my ways, you will never learn at all.  If words don’t work and my actions do not work, you will forever be lost. 

You have left me no choice but to love you in silence. - SFL May 28 2015