Wednesday, March 20, 2013

The Difference Between Compassion and Pity

From the perspective of a disabled person.

There is a huge difference between compassion and pity I think. From my experience I feel like someone who is compassionate will see everyone regardless of ability or disability as equal and will assist either when the moment is clear or when the person asks for help. Be that physically or not. The compassionate person is respectful. A person who offers pity and does things with that mindset I feel is doing more harm than good. Out of pity, a person will offer help in a condescending way and will only do it for their own gratification. Whether this is openly obvious or deeply subconscious they see themselves as better than or in higher position than the person they are helping. Now do not get me wrong, it is ok to feel good about yourself for helping someone. But you have to ensure that you did it for the right reasons and if you did not, catch yourself in it and correct it. Regardless of ability or disability everyone is on the same level as people. We are all humans who are trying to survive in a world full of selfishness and greed. We as todai of FMK, and for my fellow believers in the kwoon, must be compassionate not only to those in need but to our enemies as well. What does it accomplish if we as martial arts students, like that of MMA students, stop an attacker as violently as possible and put him/her in the hospital? It shows that we are the same. Is that what we want to show when we rep FMK? No. I have been to many different schools in my life and I have seen many different things, but from Sifu, I see a true martial artist who is concerned about teaching, not fighting. I know that this is hard, but if we exercise restraint on our future attackers, how much better will the reputation of the kwoon be? How much better will your own reputation as a martial artist be? To quote from one of the greatest Marvel superheros of all time, "With great power comes great responsibility." -Peter Parker aka Spiderman. Remember that we represent Sifu and our brothers and sisters in the kwoon in all that we do out in the world.    

8 comments:

  1. My friend, that was a great post. Come to think of compassion, how many times have we said it? Do we take the time to really understand what compassion really means? To write about it actually help understand it more. For that I say thank you. :)

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  2. Once again, wonderful post. If you have not already, I suggest you keep a document with all your writings and eventually produce a book, you have much wisdom to share and we are very fortunate to have you as a Todai of this kwoon contributing to this blog.

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    1. Sifu I was considering containing these posts into a book someday actually. It is a very good idea not just for me, but the benefit of the kwoon and future todai. I have studied for a long time and I've had a lot of that time to consider this idea; a person's teachings are only as good as that person's teacher. I have had very few good teachers to consider these ideas and concepts under. I count you Sifu as one of those good teachers.

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  3. You are most welcome Kang :) Its something that I have been mulling over in my mind for a long time. I'm not even sure I fully understand it myself. I know that I will someday. But that's the fun in studying and meditating on it. On Truth.

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    1. You are right. Keep up the good work.

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  4. I know I'm sort of late in responding, but I do really like how you put this. I've thought some about it before because you can be doing the right thing on the outside, but it doesn't always feel right on the inside. It is very important that we look at our hearts and our motives. Sometimes it can seem kind of hard to see the difference between the two, but it is very important. If more people were truely compassionate, the world would be a much better place.

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    1. I'm glad you understood what I was getting at. I worry sometimes just how clear my points actually are.. I agree with you 100%. I've even had similar experiences where I was trying to help someone who was more disabled than me. I went into it with bad motives and I ended up doing more harm to both myself and the person I was trying to help than good. Attitude and where your heart is is crucial to all that we do.

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  5. Great post, there is so many ways to actually avoid fighting. Fighting is useless as hell unless life is in great danger. Training in fighting is just a fun way to train. But for some individuals it is used to feel good about themselves, to prove themselves, to get known, to get famous, to get sex or whatever, but fighting is nothing. We're in 2013, guns are everywhere, fighting means starting a little war and war sucks. So unless i don't have any other choices, fuck fighting.

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